As a designer and introvert I am constantly challenged to find the balance between wanting to crawl into ball and avoid the world, and having the courage to share my view points and creations. This hesitation has followed me from my creative endeavors to my social life to my ability to form complete sentences during a presentation to a client. I have forever struggled with being shy and afraid to share my voice in fear of being alone in what I was thinking or the fear of not being good enough. For me this struggle has been never-ending.
First off let me start by saying the hardest part in any journey is realizing what you have to work on to move yourself forward. I have been working for the last 5+ years to move forward out of my box I painted myself into, in order to get to a point where I feel I can live a life fulfilled. I finally feel like I have some sort of a voice that I can identify with and feel confident in sharing regardless of the thoughts of others. Recently I have been reading “You are a Badass” by Jen Sincero, which is amazing if you want to kick your ass into a higher thinking and make shit happen in 2017.
There are so many poignant parts of this book, one of the quotes by Jen that really made me thinks was “ Watching someone else totally go for it can be incredibly upsetting to the person who’s spent a lifetime building a solid case for why they themselves can’t.”
I mean come on, how many people reading this have thought of something they would love to do and convince themselves they can’t for a million and a half reasons, or see someone accomplish something they have always wanted and yet again convinced themselves they can never achieve it. I used to be one of those people. I would sit and over think, over analyze, over criticize myself until I talked myself out of whatever it was I wanted to do. It is incredibly hard to be brave in a world where most people would rather tear you down versus building you up, but you have to build yourself up, be your own cheerleader, love yourself for who you are and realize that you are worth what ever happiness in life you want.
Once again, it is easier said than done, but you owe it to yourself to try. If you are reading this and want to make some changes to improve your ability to find your voice here are a few things I have found the most helpful. First, stop comparing yourself to others. The glorious thing about being you is that you alone can only create what you see and how you interrupt it, embrace your “you-ness” and learn to love your self. Love your self is number two. Not easy, but if you can muster the courage to love you, imperfections and all, that is one of the best things you can do to help yourself not only be confident in expressing your own voice but loving yourself will help you in every aspect of your life. And lastly, be brave and learn to be your own cheerleader so you can take those risks you have always been too sacred to take.
Written for Elderflower Farmacy as part of their Wisdom Wednesday series.